First lets assume that there are three potential, relevant possibilities as to what the truth is, and therefore what path to take. First, that Mormonism is true, and everything they say is correct. Second, that there is no God, especially nothing as specific as Christ. Third, that there is a holy being or beings in some form or another, but not specifically as described by Mormonism. The Mormon religion claims that absolutely everything they say is true, or nothing is.
If Mormonism were in fact true, then there would be a relatively simple means of convincing oneself of this. To this end, Mormons generally have two scriptures they reference above the others. The first was supposedly read by Joseph Smith prior to his encounter with God. James 1:5 (verse six is often referenced, with occasional use of 7 and 8):
5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
6 But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.
7 For let not that man think that he shall receive any thing of the Lord.
8 A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.
The other reference, called Moroni’s promise, is near the end of the Book of Mormon, Moroni 10:4:
And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost.
The idea is that if a person wishes to know about the truth of the Book of Mormon, and by extension the Mormon faith, they should read it, attempt to believe it, and then ask God to reinforce and confirm that belief. And assuming the church is true, it is an excellent way to build your personal testimony of that truth.
However, if the church is not true, then there is a simple, obvious problem. There is no way for this method to really disprove the church. Mormons claim that upon following the challenge to read the scriptures and ask God about them, the feelings of intense happiness and goodwill they receive will be proof that Mormonism is true. But operating under the assumption that it is not true, would not these feelings be the same?
Consider the process they ask you to undergo. First, they tell you to read the Book of Mormon, which repeatedly affirms the same series of messages. You are supposed to read these messages, not critically, but rather in a state of actively trying to believe and accept them in their entirety. Meanwhile you are encouraged to associate with other Mormons who believe and accentuate these messages. You are told to fast and think constantly on these messages as you are slowly taught an all-inclusive framework that enables you to see many of life’s coincidences as signs that the Mormon God is acting in your life. And when the time comes for you to pray and enquire, you are not guaranteed an immediate response. Basically, you are told to continue trying to believe, subjecting yourself still more to these messages (planting the seed as they put it), until you do finally receive the expected feelings.
Certainly all of this could make sense if Mormonism were true. Why wouldn’t God encourage people to build their faith through slowly opening their minds to his plan, before finally rewarding their efforts when they are ready to receive his presence? But if Mormonism weren’t true, wouldn’t the same feelings come from such a process? It is human nature to rally around a cause, to want to believe in something that justifies our existence and validates our efforts, giving us something to fight for. And any message, repeated strongly enough often enough will eventually sink in. Many cults use these same tactics to convince people of their truth. Hitler raised youth to believe that he was akin to deity; and in my own life I feel as if I can’t trust myself, having been raised in the Mormon faith and repeatedly taught their messages. When a person says, “trust your heart,” what that ultimately means is to trust everything you have been taught since you were born. If you have been brainwashed to believe something, you will feel as if that is what your heart is telling you.
The Mormons tell you that all attempts to prove or disprove their religion must take place within the framework the church has set up, which involves using their church materials, leadership, and the same prayer challenge to help you to accept individual aspects of their church. Any investigative research outside of these parameters is said to invite Satan to deceive and lead to apostasy from the church. This is, again, a valid argument if the church is true, but it also would prevent the free thought necessary to allow a person to know if the church is in fact false.
This is why I could never accept the Mormon Church. I know that given enough time, I could become convinced, at least in part, by this method. But my belief would not make it true, and I cannot knowingly subject myself to such a lie. No doubt many Mormons lead happy, fulfilled lives within their faith. But at what cost? At what cost of knowing what other answers might be out there, at what other Gods might exist, at what other fate may lay in wait beyond death? Or just what our short, precious time on this planet might mean, if it is in fact all that we have.
My name is Jared. I left the church two years ago at the age of eighteen. The Obsessive Compulsive Disorder I developed as a child, combined with the pressures applied by my Mormon family have led to two psychotic breakdowns, but I feel that I am finally reaching the point that I can live my life in a peaceful and fulfilling existence, free from the constant guilt I felt growing up. While my case is in some ways unique, I know that there are many others who have felt similarly impure and shameful, despite Mormonism’s attempts to make its members feel accepted and forgivable in the eyes of their God.
I believe in truth. I believe that it is wrong to hold ourselves back from anything but the greatest truth we can find. When we subject ourselves entirely to the beliefs of other human beings, we give them the power to dictate to us whether or not we should accept ourselves as human beings, or live in shame at not living up to the standards they set for us. We allow them to decide whom we will treat as equals, and what rights we will afford others. And we allow them to decide just what it is that we, as free individuals with unlimited potential, have to offer this world, and all the generations of humanity after us.