What is my 'agenda' for posting to this site!!

[miss taken]

BZC brought up some interetsing issues as did Jeff about why we all post to this site.

Made me think?? Do I have an agenda myself?

1) I post because I have 10 years of bottled up issues, 20+ years of very committed experience in the LDS church, and no one really to talk to who understands what I went through, both good and bad, because most of my friends are still active and I don't want to hurt them

2)I like to read what others feel about certain issues, and gain from their perspective

3) I like to continue to learn about how the church deals with doctrines/historical issues/ethics, and this seems a good place to get in the know, since the church will never tell the truth.

That's it I think.. What's your agenda???

Mary

[Jeff_Ricks]

BZC brought up some interetsing issues as did Jeff about why we all post to this site.

Made me think?? Do I have an agenda myself?

1) I post because I have 10 years of bottled up issues, 20+ years of very committed experience in the LDS church, and no one really to talk to who understands what I went through, both good and bad, because most of my friends are still active and I don't want to hurt them

2)I like to read what others feel about certain issues, and gain from their perspective

3) I like to continue to learn about how the church deals with doctrines/historical issues/ethics, and this seems a good place to get in the know, since the church will never tell the truth.

That's it I think.. What's your agenda???

Mary

I think there's a fine line between purpose and agenda. We all have a purpose for posting here. I have a purpose in starting the site in the first place, but to me a purpose becomes an agenda when posting to bounce thoughts off others and to support others becomes posting to push and promote one's views. So in those terms I disagree with our recently departing member that we all have an agenda.

My purpose for starting the site was to provide a high quality forum where former Mormons can meet, share thoughts and feelings and support each other. I don't think I have anything to promote in doing so.

Jeff

[silverfox]

I have participated in other boards regarding Mormonism. I got burned out on them. I needed to let go so that I could move on. I got stuck in my anger and resentment and wasn't progressing.

A friend sent me a link to Post Mo. I checked it out for fun. I like what I see here. The articles, the humor (peepstone), the respectful way in which members share their experiences, thoughts, emotions, etc.

And I realized that there will always be a need for support. I could not have moved on and let go of Mo'ism had I not stumbled on the other boards and realized I was NOT alone. Every person questioning the church should have support available to them. It's a necessity to come out emotionally healthy, IMO, for most beginning their journey.

My purpose for my participation in this board is to "support the support" that is being provided. To help maintain a site that offers support, answers to questions, etc.

In doing that I have the opportunity to continue to learn and grow.

[shamdiel]

I do have a agenda. It is to see how leaving Moism behind has affected other people, that have left it. I want to know what their thoughts, feelings, emotions and experiences were and are with family, friends, and Mormons they associate/d with. I hope by so doing, I will better understand my own experiences. I find reading about other people's thoughts and experiences, causes me to think or focus more clearly on my own.

A couple of things that are hard to find, after you have left the church, is an ear to listen or a friendly voice to give honest advice and support. I find that there are many such ears and voices on this site. It makes it worth comming here.

I have no agenda to push. I do not believe that anything I have learned or experienced is any more important than someone else's experiences or understanding. It is all a soup and I like the flavor that every person brings here. :) Makes it all the more fun!

John

[bigeddy]

To use Jeff's model with some honesty I would say that I have both purpose and agenda.

My purpose in posting is two-fold. One, to vent at times. I still get angry when I see people abused by the power of "knowing", people who "know" things scare the hell out of me. Two, to hear my own voice bounce off the walls of intelligent others and rebound to me altered, enriched and clarified.

My agenda: to promote true growth. That growth at times can be horizontal if a person needs further horizontal growth to enable them to see that they cannot solve the problems without growing to a new paradigm--vertical growth. So, Jeff, I have an agenda that I push on others. I don't know how that will go over with ya'll. I am pushing people to grow vertically. I believe that growth beyond mormonism requires sooner or later some vertical growth. I watched the interchange with Bzcutah and recognized in him a person resisting vertical growth. There is no difference in my mind between someone who "knows" Joe is a prophet from one who "knows" Allah wants me to fly planes into buildings or from one who "knows" God believes homosexuality is a sin. It is all horizontal difference within the red or blue meme (using Claire Grave's model). "Post-Mormon" (I was present and helped give that name to the group) was used to imply not some horizontal difference or opposition (anti-mormon would suffice for that) but a growth vertically beyond, and yes above--in the same way that fifth grade is above first grade--mormonism.

So, I do have that purpose and that agenda. I hope that is okay.

Ed

[silverfox]

There can be positive and negative puposes/agendas.

IMO, maybe the questions to ask then is, "Is my agenda/purpose in harmony with the purpose of this board? Is it productive to the members of the board? And if not, am I going to be deceitful in how I share or promote my agenda/purpose?"

[wescape]

My reason for posting on this site is to come alongside people who have had the courage to leave Mormonism. It can be a rocky path of difficult emotions, confusion, and loneliness as we all know. As many of you also know, I plan to start a non-profit cult recovery center once I finish school. My desire is to see people find healing from their experiences in cults like Mormonism (and maybe even solely Moism depending on the response). Unfortunately, as a full-time graduate student, I am unable to post as often as I would like to. I've been pretty busy lately writing papers and such and I seem to have missed why Bzcutah left which apparently started this thread. Could someone fill me in?

Wes

[silverfox]

My reason for posting on this site is to come alongside people who have had the courage to leave Mormonism. It can be a rocky path of difficult emotions, confusion, and loneliness as we all know. As many of you also know, I plan to start a non-profit cult recovery center once I finish school. My desire is to see people find healing from their experiences in cults like Mormonism (and maybe even solely Moism depending on the response). Unfortunately, as a full-time graduate student, I am unable to post as often as I would like to. I've been pretty busy lately writing papers and such and I seem to have missed why Bzcutah left which apparently started this thread. Could someone fill me in?

Wes

Only bzcutah can answer why he left. He did not provide a clear explanation. IMO, however, he was not comfortable with Jeff and I questioning his intent regarding the purpose of a thread he started. I also used my best judegement to delete an additional thread on the topic where again I questioned his intent. If you want specific details regarding this please PM me. I don't want this thread turning into a debate over why he left.

I will add that I am sorry he made the choice to leave. Jeff nor I wanted him to leave. It was his choice.

The thread is here....you can draw your own conclusion as to why he left.

http://www.postmormon.org/forum_vb/showthread.php?t=285&page=9&pp=15

[miss taken]

Only bzcutah can answer why he left. He did not provide a clear explanation. IMO, however, he was not comfortable with Jeff and I questioning his intent regarding the purpose of a thread he started. I also used my best judegement to delete an additional thread on the topic where again I questioned his intent. If you want specific details regarding this please PM me. I don't want this thread turning into a debate over why he left.

I will add that I am sorry he made the choice to leave. Jeff nor I wanted him to leave. It was his choice.

The thread is here....you can draw your own conclusion as to why he left.

http://www.postmormon.org/forum_vb/showthread.php?t=285&page=9&pp=15

No, no please don't turn this into a debate on BZ, my reason for posting was to find out why people post. There have been some brilliant answers, so I am really glad I started the thread.
Mary

[silverfox]

No, no please don't turn this into a debate on BZ, my reason for posting was to find out why people post. There have been some brilliant answers, so I am really glad I started the thread.
Mary

I agree - I love the feedback you are getting on this thread. Thanks, Miss Taken for starting it.

[Jeff_Ricks]

To use Jeff's model with some honesty I would say that I have both purpose and agenda.

My purpose in posting is two-fold. One, to vent at times. I still get angry when I see people abused by the power of "knowing", people who "know" things scare the hell out of me. Two, to hear my own voice bounce off the walls of intelligent others and rebound to me altered, enriched and clarified.

My agenda: to promote true growth. That growth at times can be horizontal if a person needs further horizontal growth to enable them to see that they cannot solve the problems without growing to a new paradigm--vertical growth. So, Jeff, I have an agenda that I push on others. I don't know how that will go over with ya'll. I am pushing people to grow vertically. I believe that growth beyond mormonism requires sooner or later some vertical growth. I watched the interchange with Bzcutah and recognized in him a person resisting vertical growth. There is no difference in my mind between someone who "knows" Joe is a prophet from one who "knows" Allah wants me to fly planes into buildings or from one who "knows" God believes homosexuality is a sin. It is all horizontal difference within the red or blue meme (using Claire Grave's model). "Post-Mormon" (I was present and helped give that name to the group) was used to imply not some horizontal difference or opposition (anti-mormon would suffice for that) but a growth vertically beyond, and yes above--in the same way that fifth grade is above first grade--mormonism.

So, I do have that purpose and that agenda. I hope that is okay.

Ed

Ed if that’s your agenda then I fully welcome it because it’s inline with what we have set out to do with this post-Mormon thing. Everyone is certainly entitled to promote their agenda as much as we are ours, but I think everyone realizes that if we open our forum and organization to everyone with an agenda then we end up working against each other, nothing gets done, and the need we’ve set out to fill remains unfilled.

I'm going to stick my neck out a little and show you what will probably be our official 'agenda' as an organization. It's a draft version of our mission statement waiting for one more approval before it's official. I hope the other board members don't shoot me for jumping the gun!

"The Mission of Post-Mormon.org is to provide and maintain systems that facilitate the growth and development of a safe and supportive community for those who leave or are considering leaving the Mormon Church. Welcome Home."

If anyone's agenda is inline with that agenda and wants to promote it here then she or he will most likely be welcome with open arms. Otherwise we'll have problems and one of us we'll have to shelve our agenda or leave.................. and it aint gonna be us. ;)

My two bits worth.

Jeff

[stu4491]

I am fairly new to this site but here are the reasons I post and read here:

1) Like others, this is a great place to vent and get feedback from others whom have had problems with moism. I feel very alone since my lost faith and here I am able to express why I feel the way I do and hear from others that stimulate my thoughts in other ways.

2) I have spent all the years of my life as part of a group (mo church) that bascially drove the way I lived my life and now I no longer attend church and associate in a spiritual way with those members so the need to find a group of people whom believe and understand more closely to way I do right now makes memership in this forum fulfilling for me.

3) I still have many questions and concerns about how moism has affected me and my family and can get some good comments and feedback to help my understanding while posting and reading on this site.

4) This site compared to others I have visited seems more in tune with my intellect and maturity level and I feel more comortable in sharing thoughts and feelings here.

So, I am happy to be here and it is very helpful at my present stage of leaving moism. :)

[Born Free]

It is about 15 years since I was Xed. My exiting process had its tentative beginnings many, many years before that.

Recently I had occasion to have dealings with some Mos knocking on the out door, and baulking and stumbling about. At that point I reviewed my exit trajectory and realised that the process did not have to be as long and difficult as I had done it, so I started to give thought to how it might have been easier.

Somewhere during that process I came across Post-Mo.com and its wave-length had a strong resonance with mine. So my agenda has several strands:

I feel on a similar "wavelength" with many who occupy this space.

I look back with some frustration at how long and arduous my journey has been, and believe that it could have been done in 1/3 the time with access to the right information and support. Indeed, if this site had existed 35 years ago (impossible I know), I am sure I woudl have walked away from Mormonism as soon as I left home.

I would hope that others could benefit from some of my experience, if I share it in an attractive manner.

Likewise, I expect some people here will be further down the road overall or in specific areas, and so hope that I can glean from their experience and wisdom.

I value the dialectic process (thesis/antithesis/synthesis) greatly, and where others have a foundation of skills to be able to engage in such a process with respect and open-mindedness, I find it generates in me a journey of discovery and stimulation.

I think that covers the key elements of my 'agenda'.

BTW, I think the draft Mission Statement is spot on. I'd like to keep revisiting it for a bit to see if it misses any elements, but upon initial impressions - GREAT!

Daryl

PS: In case that sounds all too grandiose, I too still need a place to dump and burn occasionally. Part of me does not like the persistance of that, so I do hope for some form of better understanding of and hopefully resolution of residual anger for all the lying, mushrooming, and guilt-tripping.

[free thinker]

Now that BigEddy has stated it I understand that I am here to get support as I pursue verticle growth. I have always been keenly aware of whatever distance I have come as a human being. At first leaving mormonism seemed to be a step back growth-wise. But alas I have found that is was a step forward, or up, if we are using the model of vertical or horizontal.

The pain and fear in leaving is real, and I have leaned on all my fellow travelers here at post-mo. I enjoy the wit, wisdom, and sometimes downright indignation of the people on this site.

As my anger , caused by what I perceive as a betrayal, subsides, I find a better man emerging. One who is less judgemental, (especially of myself), more at peace, and
and far more independent.

Also I want to reach out to those who think their life will come apart if they leave mormonism.

Here's to verticle growth!!! :cool:

Free Thinker

[bigeddy]

2 things.

It has always fascinated me how growth beyond so often looks like regression. Wilber has a whole notion about it and deals with the pre/post falacy. Not only does it feel like a regression to us but others, viewing from the outside, are confused as to which of us has actually grown past the conventional stage and which is actually still in the pre-conventional stage, hence the pre/post fallacy. There are some wonderful writings on what was mentioned in the above post.

Second. Jeff, I don't know what to do. I hate mission statements. I know that it is my prejudice (I may just have to get beyond it) but the "mission statement" thing was so strong right when I was leaving the church and is symbolically linked in mind with the morg. Every home was supposed to have a "mission statement" (translated by me as a mushy statement). It was all so much a part of franklin planners, 7 habits of highly dysfunctional people and so forth that I swore I would honor only the mission statement that stated "I will never have a mission statement." Anyway, I wanted to have some fun with this. I do understand what the MS is all about and I like the one you have tentatively sent out. Looks good to me. BUT, can we please, maybe, perhaps, call is something else?

Ed

[Jeff_Ricks]

Second. Jeff, I don't know what to do. I hate mission statements. I know that it is my prejudice (I may just have to get beyond it) but the "mission statement" thing was so strong right when I was leaving the church and is symbolically linked in mind with the morg. Every home was supposed to have a "mission statement" (translated by me as a mushy statement). It was all so much a part of franklin planners, 7 habits of highly dysfunctional people and so forth that I swore I would honor only the mission statement that stated "I will never have a mission statement." Anyway, I wanted to have some fun with this. I do understand what the MS is all about and I like the one you have tentatively sent out. Looks good to me. BUT, can we please, maybe, perhaps, call is something else?

Ed

We could call it a statement of purpose. I should clarify that the statement isn't something we make public like an official slogan we publish on our website, (and I'm starting to think it was a mistake that I did make it public at all :o ), it's to remind the management team what our purpose is so that over time we don't stray too far from that purpose. In a nutshell it's like driving a stake in the ground saying THIS is what we do, let's make sure we don't get too sidtracked from it in the future.

So don't expect to see much of the statement if at all, other than in some of our management documentation. Don't expect to see it as an offical slogan on the website anywhere. Nope, that ain't gonna happen.

Jeff

[miss taken]

We could call it a statement of purpose. I should clarify that the statement isn't something we make public like an official slogan we publish on our website, (and I'm starting to think it was a mistake that I did make it public at all :o ), it's to remind the management team what our purpose is so that over time we don't stray too far from that purpose. In a nutshell it's like driving a stake in the ground saying THIS is what we do, let's make sure we don't get too sidtracked from it in the future.

So don't expect to see much of the statement if at all, other than in some of our management documentation. Don't expect to see it as an offical slogan on the website anywhere. Nope, that ain't gonna happen.

Jeff

How about calling them articles of faith!!!!!!!
(no-one throw anything at me ok!!!)