Update on Darkslider (promted in part by Why Me's post)

[darkslider]

Ready for this?

On Balance: Lately I have been fighting an inner battle for a peace that seemed to have disappeared for a while.

I was having problems with my businesses, problems with my spiritual journey, even problems with my bride.

There was an imbalance in my life that I was having a difficult time correcting. There were several areas that I was pouring all of my focus into, at such a level that other aspects of my life were falling into neglect.

Business was taking over my life. . . business for the wrong reasons. It was taking over to such a point that I was neglecting my relationships, neglecting myself, I was even neglecting my business.

But with the help of a few gurus, such as Anthony DeMello, and quite a few hours a day spent in self-inflection and meditation, I think I have found my balance again.

On Wife and Mormonism: After avoiding the topic of Mormonism by mutual agreement, my wife and I have had several interesting conversations regarding Mormonism recently.

During the course of these conversations Megan has expressed to me that she doesn't actually believe in Mormonism.

She likes a few of the teachings (namely: Families are Important) but has admitted that there is nothing that she likes that couldn't have been found anywhere else.

She revealed to me something that I had not known previously, and that is that she hasn't believed for nearly three years. That revelation was definetly a shock to my system. . . I mean, this is the woman that was urging me to pretend to be Mormon so that we could be sealed in the Temple.

On Business: I have cut back on what I was engaged in. No longer am I working my ass off for seven businesses. I was stretching myself way too thin.

So, I have cut back to just a few. . . and am looking for a part time job. The job hunt isn't going so well. . . I live in Orem so there are like 40,000 people competing for 5,000 jobs. . . or so it seems.

Art of Desecration and Nerd Corp Networking are still up and running. . . and I am still working on my book "Beat Your Ticket!"

Other than that, I am not doing much by way of business. This new path has allowed me to refocuse my energies on things that are more important to my personal goals in life.

I have spent a lot of time on this post. . . finding the right words to express what is going on in my head. . . It has taken me nearly four hours to get this organized.

Hope you all have fun. . . I keep lurking and should have more time to pop in now and then.

[why me]

Ready for this?

On Balance: Lately I have been fighting an inner battle for a peace that seemed to have disappeared for a while.

I was having problems with my businesses, problems with my spiritual journey, even problems with my bride.

There was an imbalance in my life that I was having a difficult time correcting. There were several areas that I was pouring all of my focus into, at such a level that other aspects of my life were falling into neglect.

Business was taking over my life. . . business for the wrong reasons. It was taking over to such a point that I was neglecting my relationships, neglecting myself, I was even neglecting my business.

But with the help of a few gurus, such as Anthony DeMello, and quite a few hours a day spent in self-inflection and meditation, I think I have found my balance again.

On Wife and Mormonism: After avoiding the topic of Mormonism by mutual agreement, my wife and I have had several interesting conversations regarding Mormonism recently.

During the course of these conversations Megan has expressed to me that she doesn't actually believe in Mormonism.

She likes a few of the teachings (namely: Families are Important) but has admitted that there is nothing that she likes that couldn't have been found anywhere else.

She revealed to me something that I had not known previously, and that is that she hasn't believed for nearly three years. That revelation was definetly a shock to my system. . . I mean, this is the woman that was urging me to pretend to be Mormon so that we could be sealed in the Temple.

On Business: I have cut back on what I was engaged in. No longer am I working my ass off for seven businesses. I was stretching myself way too thin.

So, I have cut back to just a few. . . and am looking for a part time job. The job hunt isn't going so well. . . I live in Orem so there are like 40,000 people competing for 5,000 jobs. . . or so it seems.

Art of Desecration and Nerd Corp Networking are still up and running. . . and I am still working on my book "Beat Your Ticket!"

Other than that, I am not doing much by way of business. This new path has allowed me to refocuse my energies on things that are more important to my personal goals in life.

I have spent a lot of time on this post. . . finding the right words to express what is going on in my head. . . It has taken me nearly four hours to get this organized.

Hope you all have fun. . . I keep lurking and should have more time to pop in now and then.
Thanks for the post...I was wondering about you and what was happening to you. I am glad that all is well with you and your wife...this is the main thing anyway..isn't it? It sounds very interesting what megan said to you. I am sure you are having interesting discussions with one another about it. Take care darkslider....and keep lurking and give a post here or there as an update or as a way of connecting with us.... :)

[miss taken]

Sounds like life is going good for you. Great.

I think your wife may not be the only one that harbours doubts Dark.

I think most members in an unthreatening environment, would admit to the same. Even the GA's.

Just my opinion.
Mary

[silverfox]

Ready for this?

On Balance: Lately I have been fighting an inner battle for a peace that seemed to have disappeared for a while.

I was having problems with my businesses, problems with my spiritual journey, even problems with my bride.

There was an imbalance in my life that I was having a difficult time correcting. There were several areas that I was pouring all of my focus into, at such a level that other aspects of my life were falling into neglect.

Business was taking over my life. . . business for the wrong reasons. It was taking over to such a point that I was neglecting my relationships, neglecting myself, I was even neglecting my business.

But with the help of a few gurus, such as Anthony DeMello, and quite a few hours a day spent in self-inflection and meditation, I think I have found my balance again.

On Wife and Mormonism: After avoiding the topic of Mormonism by mutual agreement, my wife and I have had several interesting conversations regarding Mormonism recently.

During the course of these conversations Megan has expressed to me that she doesn't actually believe in Mormonism.

She likes a few of the teachings (namely: Families are Important) but has admitted that there is nothing that she likes that couldn't have been found anywhere else.

She revealed to me something that I had not known previously, and that is that she hasn't believed for nearly three years. That revelation was definetly a shock to my system. . . I mean, this is the woman that was urging me to pretend to be Mormon so that we could be sealed in the Temple.

On Business: I have cut back on what I was engaged in. No longer am I working my ass off for seven businesses. I was stretching myself way too thin.

So, I have cut back to just a few. . . and am looking for a part time job. The job hunt isn't going so well. . . I live in Orem so there are like 40,000 people competing for 5,000 jobs. . . or so it seems.

Art of Desecration and Nerd Corp Networking are still up and running. . . and I am still working on my book "Beat Your Ticket!"

Other than that, I am not doing much by way of business. This new path has allowed me to refocuse my energies on things that are more important to my personal goals in life.

I have spent a lot of time on this post. . . finding the right words to express what is going on in my head. . . It has taken me nearly four hours to get this organized.

Hope you all have fun. . . I keep lurking and should have more time to pop in now and then.

Great to hear from you.

I finally ordered my WTF shirts this morning. Can't wait to get them. Got one for my friend for her bday. Allowing PayPal as a source of payment is WONDERFUL. Makes it way easy.

Now I can't wait to wear my WTF shirt. heh heh The funny thing is most Mos will probably go "What does "wtf" mean?" I will gladly tell them. :D

[peter_mary]

Dear Dark Dude,

I think that wisdom is learning to work with the ebb flow of life, realizing that it is constantly moving out of balance. The ability to center oneself again and again, always, is probably the greatest tool a person could ever learn. The fact that you're learning it and are barely of legal drinking age :D is a great credit to you.

Peace, friend.

And log Megan on to PostMormon.org!

Peter_Mary

[hamar]

Darkslider, I'm happy that things are improving, although I thought I heard that there is still a long haul ahead. Hope that goes well. One day at a time.
I used to live in Orem. Can't help but thinking your current environment might be part of the problem.
I saw a cute TV ad this morning while getting a little treadmill time in. It was about someone complaining that there TV sucked. Showed things getting sucked into the TV. Sort of like a metaphoric black hole. I suspect there is a parallel there somewhere about the things that many of us are dealing with on our road to recovery. The black hole called mormonism.

[darkslider]

Why Me: You are correct. It is the main focus (or rather, it should be). And yes. The conversations we have been having lately are much better suited to growth both personally and relationship-wise.

You know, there is an interesting parallel between the stated purpose of this site and my current paradigm. We both (site/me) promote growth for the sake of growing.

There is only one other naturally occuring phenomenom that promotes that. Any guesses? The answer might lead Peter_Mary to an idea for a Peep Stone article.

Miss Taken: I completely agree with you on that. Megan's family, many of whom looked down upon our marriage because it wasn't in a temple, is riddled with people having doubts.

I have had 9 people (out of 30 or so) come to me via email or phone and ask me questions about early church history and problems they are having with the Church.

I have found a rather useful way to weed out the people who are not ready for real information. I have now officially adopted this as my only "convert" method.

When first approached, I asked them two questions.

1. Do you honestly think you are ready for this?

2. Are you going to actually listen to me or are you going to ignore everything I say?

If both of those answers are to my liking. . . I hand them a copy of Insider's View of Early Mormon Origins. I tell them to read it, keep notes on what they are reading and call me if they have questions. When they finish it, they are to return it and we can have a discussion about it. Answering questions and clarifying if need be.

So far, it seems to work.

Silverfox: Good to hear. I had a feeling that the two Tanks were from you.

Wear them with pride :)

Peter_Mary: Learning that has definetly helped me over the last couple of weeks. I have been drinking since I was. . . oh, you said "legal drinking age". Never mind. :)

As for Megan. . . maybe someday. She is still kind of leery about the ex-mos. Even though she hasn't believed for a while, she still has that cult programming of "Us vs. Them" and she still has a hard time realizing that not every person who isn't a member goes around raping and murdering.

Although, her job seems to be helping her understand that clearer. Most of the people that she works with (She is staff at the State Mental Hospital) are Mormon. . . and by her own admission "the ones that are nicest to work with won't have anything to do with Mormonism."

We shall see. There may come a day when she is ready to come online with it.

Hamar: One day indeed.

You had a rather keen observation regarding the location that we are currently at. And believe me. . . it is something that we have placed a lot of thought into. Unfortunatly, it seems that right now is not the best time to pick up and move. But, that is in the works.

Thanks for your words and thoughts, people.

HAHAHA! Duh, I am so stupid. I just got something. . . Look for further posts from me.